I once read a quote that said: "that which you are most afraid to write, write that."
Well... this is that. There are a few topics I have some ideas about, but I can't bring myself to write just to write. I write because I have something to say. I write because I feel things, and I feel the need to share them. I write because my heart feels everything deeply... everything, and it needs an outlet. And this is it. I have lost a lot of relationships in my life - romantic, or otherwise. A lot of friendships have fallen apart, or drifted away. There are people I thought I could count on that let me down, and I know there are people that thought they could count on me, only to be let down. There are chapters in my life that have closed because I wanted them to, and others that were shut in my face. There have been things I wanted and people I've missed so deeply I could feel it in my bones. There are people I have hurt, and people who have hurt me. There are times I have been selfish, and others I have been giving. There are times I have been serious, and others I have just been having fun. I know, though, that no one's heart is an object to just have fun with. No one's heart deserves to be toyed with, including mine. While many relationships have ended, very few have ended explosively. Most have simply faded. Others... just weren't right. I have been reflecting on this quite a bit recently. I am grateful for the ones I love, and those who love me. We, as a culture, do not appreciate this enough. We do not appreciate time we have together enough, until we no longer have it. We do not appreciate the power of kind words until we no longer receive them. We do not appreciate the laughter, the love, the hugs until they fade away. Upon reflection, these are a few lessons I have learned from my broken relationships. 1. Be kind. 2. Let things go. 3. Linger. 4. Get off your phone. 5. Make time to do things. They are simple lessons. They are simple actions. But they are not ones we do. We are quick to pick fights when others don't see things our way. We are quick to get angry when our high expectations aren't met, and quick to forget the other person is just a person too. We are quick to hold on to this anger, and lose hours of time because of it. The energy we spend being angry is energy we cannot spend loving. The two cannot exist together. We are quick to be annoyed when someone acts differently than we do. We are quick to be irritated when someone cannot read our mind. We are quick to assume we are right. We always assume we are right. Sometimes we are. But the energy we spend being angry is energy we cannot spend loving. The two cannot exist together. We are quick to rush off, to do the next thing. We are quick to pay our bill and go to the movies. We are quick to clean the kitchen after a meal. We are quick to hang up the phone when the conversation runs dry. Linger a little longer next time. There is beauty in just being. There is joy in staying to finish your coffee. There is peace in stillness. We are quick to assume we will have time later to be together. That's the problem - we always think we have time. We spend our time together apart, with our heads in our phones. We lose so much time together even when we are together. We lose conversations. We lose time to linger. We lose that time. The worst part is, we choose to lose that time. We choose our phones over our loved ones. We are quick to assume we will have time later to be together. That's the problem - we always think we have time. We do not make an effort to experience things together. Life is made of experiences, and we actively choose not to pursue them. We miss out on memories to talk about for a life time. We must be intentional about making these memories. They are the glue that holds us. They are our reference point when things are going south. We are quick to assume we will have time later to be together. That's the problem - we always think we have time. We must love our loved ones. We must be intentional about loving our loved ones. Too many relationships end. Too many people fade away. Too many hearts break. We must love our loved ones.
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AuthorHello! I'm Becca -humanitarian, caffeine addict, lover of books, people, and all things Jesus. You can find me in my pajamas, day dreaming about rainy days and saving the world. Archives
May 2018
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