I feel like I'm always praying for clarity. Whether it's my career, my relationships with others, or anything in between - I am constantly asking for clarity. Yet, it rarely comes. When I was a senior in college, closer to God than I had ever been, I was faced with a big decision. I was blessed enough to have two amazing possibilities in front of me, but had no idea which one to choose. So I made pro/con lists, I looked into costs, and I prayed and prayed and prayed. I did all these things in search of one thing: a clear answer. Which path do I choose God? What do I do? I would journal, I would pray, I would read my bible - just longing for God's answer. I needed a clear "choice 1" or "choice 2." I needed to be TOLD what to do. That clear answer never came. And here I am yet again - worrying about choices I do not yet have to face, just waiting for God to be straight with me. I pray consistently for clarity, and for courage to follow His lead once He does speak to me. Though I pray every day for this, I still wait. And I get discouraged, and overwhelmed. Can you not hear me, God? Why are you not answering me? I begin to try to make my choice on my own - feeling alone in my decision, the burden incredible. Upon reflection of my disappointment, something occurred to me: I expect God to act the way I want Him to, and get frustrated when He does not. But God...is God. He is not human, and he is certainly not my own personal clarity vending machine. No, His nature is so much greater than that. But God...is certainly not my own personal clarity vending machine. My God may not answer me in the format I wish of Him, but He always hears me, and He always answers. He answers in ways like, "In all ways God works for the good of those who love Him," (Romans 8:28) and "Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?" (Matthew 6:26). He answers in ways like, "Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow. Tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." (Matthew 6:34). His answer is ever the same. His answer is always, "trust me." Easier said than done, I know. So what do we do? Wait for things to just fall in our laps, complacent in our uncertaintly? Surely not. Instead, we do what we are instructed to. Instead of worrying about what we do not know what to do, we keep following God in the ways we do know - by praying, by serving, by loving. We let God direct our footsteps today, confident He will guide our path tomorrow - we keep our eyes "fixed on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of our faith," (Hebrews 12:2). As Luke says, "Whoever is faithful in small things is also faithful in much." (Luke 16:10). His answer is ever the same. His answer is always, "trust me." We do this in faith, "being confident in this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus," (Philippians 1:6). And we know we can, because "God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but of power, love and self-discipline," (2 Timothy 1:7). It's all we can do - trust God today to take care of tomorrow. Let God guide our steps today, constantly pursuing what is just and holy. Taking it one step at a time, if you will, knowing that God will be with us at each one. Our human nature struggles with this. We want to be in control, we want to know what's going to happen next - that's where our faith comes in. If it were easy, everyone would do it. As C.S. Lewis once said, “I didn’t go to religion to make me happy. I always knew a bottle of Port would do that. If you want a religion to make you feel really comfortable, I certainly don’t recommend Christianity.” The Lord does not call us to a life of comfort, but of growth. And I am learning to accept this may be a season in which I grow, in which I surrender my desire to be in charge to the King that is, in which I realize that I cannot figure it out on my own, nor do I want to. This is my season of growth, and maybe it's yours as well. May we ever be in excited anticipation of what's to come, knowing the Lord will always be good to us.
2 Comments
Denise Ballard
5/22/2017 08:28:28 am
I can testify to the validity of being patient and waiting on God to give clarity. Though, sometimes it feels as if it never comes, there are times when God speaks directly to your heart. For me, I prayed for three years for clarity on a purpose that God laid on my heart. Six weeks ago, he gave me clarity and the ministry is growing exponentially. His calling is causing me to make some steps that I am fearfully excited about. Your C.S. Lewis quote about Christianity being uncomfortable is right on target. If we want to grow in Christ and if we want others to be reached for Christ, we must step outside our comfort zone.
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Stacey V
5/22/2017 08:51:38 pm
Love this! Sometimes I think about the fact that I get so sunk down in not having clarity that I miss the whole point and am no longer looking at the Cross. Clarity becomes my salvation, and if I don't have it, i feel lost and like God doesn't love me. But I feel like most of the Biblical heroes were confused at some point, because God really doesn't give straight answers or he gives answers that seem to cause a whole lot more problems in our eyes. He probably withholds clarity because He knows I either won't understand His call and so reject it because I can't see where it's taking me, or I'll run off with the clarity and forget about my need for relationship with Jesus.
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AuthorHello! I'm Becca -humanitarian, caffeine addict, lover of books, people, and all things Jesus. You can find me in my pajamas, day dreaming about rainy days and saving the world. Archives
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